Warm greetings to you!
My practice is dedicated to supporting neurodiverse couples in which one partner is neurotypical and the other is or may be autistic.
Sometimes, a partner has a diagnosis of autism. Sometimes, they suspect they meet the criteria. And sometimes, it is their partners who introduce the possibility. Couples want to explore their challenges and understand them better in order to restore peace and intimacy to their relationship.
Both sides of the relationship, the neurotypical and the autistic, deserve exploration. I can help you understand the other side of your relationship without expecting one partner to do all the changing, while helping you discover ways to change if that is your desire.
At the beginning, we explore the definition and meaning of autism. It is important to remember that autism exists on a spectrum. Each person has talents, skills, hopes, dreams, as well as concerns and problems. Each person has a unique set of life experiences, character, and values. Just as there is no such thing as a Neurotypical Personality, there is also no Autism Personality. Autism is expressed to varying degrees and in different ways in each individual. A diagnosis of autism is not a defining label. It is an opportunity to begin exploring the expressions of the neurological differences between the autistic and neurotypical.
Equally important, and often misunderstood and taken for granted, is the world of the neurotypical partner.
We live in a neurotypical world, designed by and for neurotypical individuals to meet our needs. As such, much of the rationale behind it is invisible. Bringing this to consciousness is critical if a couple is to understand their differences.
I can help you create bridges for better understanding of each other, leading to better communication. We do this through education about neurodiversity and its implications. Often this means going slowly to redefine terms, create new ways of listening and responding to each other, and developing more skillful means of identifying and expressing your own emotions.
I work to support the emotional, psychological, and spiritual needs of couples who come to me. There is often an existential component to this work as well, as individuals struggle to find meaning in their behaviors, their primary intimate relationship, and their lives.
Together we will explore areas of consistent blocks, and after identifying them, I will help you learn to understand them, to offer and accept forgiveness if necessary, and to move forward in your relationship. Most often, this leads to exciting willingness to undertake the growth that will heal your relationship and create a positive path forward for both of you.
There are times, however, when an informed decision can now be made to reconfigure the relationship in a new constellation that works for both partners. We will explore ways that you can do this as well.
I work with all couples – straight, gay, lesbian, polyamorous, transgender. This is about understanding neurodiversity, so that you can heal and grow.
I also have a teaching website called The Neurodiverse Couple, where you can explore current courses as well as read about upcoming additions. I am always adding new material. Most courses are the equivalent of three sessions and run approximately three hours. You will have permanent access once you enroll in a course, so you can review the material at your own pace and revisit it at any time. If you'd like to see previews of the courses, they're available on my YouTube Channel for The Neurodiverse Couple.